Be Susegad

India is a land with history where foreign conquerors established their supremacy in various parts of the country. Though these erstwhile rulers are now a part of the pages of our history, they have left their footprints in our country in form of their architecture, languages and culture, giving us an opportunity to walk back into the times when these powers dominated our nation. Having frequently appreciated British architecture in Mumbai, it was time to visit the state of India where the Portuguese ruled. We visited Goa, widely known today as the party capital of India. I had visited Goa as a child, but Goa has a changed a lot in the last few years. Going there again was something to look forward to, to feel if the changed face of Goa still brought any childhood memories back.

Several Bollywood films have glamourized Goa. Goa has more to offer than just parties. Idyllic beaches and vast expanse of coconut trees add to the beauty. To reach the erstwhile Portuguese home, we travelled by Tejas Express, a premium train offering flight-like experience. On the way to our hotel, we saw several houses painted in bright colours depicting the colourful, contented and susegad i.e. relaxed life the people lead. Since our hotel was in the vicinity of Calangute Beach, we headed to this ‘happening’ place in the evening. Swarming with people in every corner, this beach is lucrative to many who have set up restaurants and bars, ensuring good time to those who wanted to relax. To create an energetic atmosphere, famous dance tracks were playing thus strengthening the party mood. We walked on the beach enjoying the view of the sea and the people who enjoyed getting drenched along the waves. The bright orange evening sun was taking leave for the day promising to bring a sunshine full of hope the next day. As a child I thought that the sea swallows the sun when it sets. I felt nostalgic remembering the naivety of childhood.

Next day we set out to explore South Goa. Our first spot was Coco Beach, named after the large number of coconut trees that surround it. Sitting in a boat we had an amazing rendezvous with the dolphins who swam along the boat as if to build camaraderie with us and exhibited their stellar swimming skills. As we sailed in Coco Beach, we got views of the Old Portuguese jail, Aguada fort and millionaire palace. The old Portuguese jail looked ramshackle, having lost its former glory. The bungalow of a diamond merchant nestled in the greenery looked grandiose concurring to his rich status. The cool sea breeze while we sailed made it a soothing experience. Our next stop was Miramar Beach which gave me a déjà vu feeling of having visited it as a child and building sand castles with my sister. The almost white sand and the clear water reminded me of Bondi Beach in Sydney. Tall coconut trees act as welcoming entrance while walking towards Miramar Beach. Next we visited Dona Paula, where Mandovi and Zuari rivers meet the Arabian Sea.

In spite of having the image of a party hub, Goa is also home to religious faiths in form of beautiful churches and temples. We visited Balaji and Mangeshi Temple and sought blessings of the Almighty. Mangeshi is an incarnation of Shiva and also the deity of Mangeshkar family. The splendid architecture of the temple embellishes the divine presence of God. We experienced serenity in God’s own abode. To meet God in His next home and experience divinity again, we paid a visit to Basilica of Bom Jesus and Se Cathedral. Basilica of Bom Jesus is a UNESCO world heritage site and holds mortal remains of St. Xavier. It is said that the saint’s body is still fresh as the day it was buried. We got the view of the mortal remains of St. Xavier and it seemed that he was in a deep, peaceful sleep. The interior of the church is simple though it is guarded by strong altars. We experienced the same serenity inside the church in divine presence. This tall church and its intricate designs enthralled me. In the courtyard, we saw a beautiful view of the memorable day when Jesus was born in a shed-like structure surrounded by various animals. The statues of Mother Mary, Joseph and baby Jesus in a manger looked lifelike, letting us imagine that day when the Lord was born. The Se Cathedral, which stands opposite Basilica of Bom Jesus, was built by Portuguese to commemorate the victory of Afonso de Albuquerque, a Portuguese general against the Muslims. The Se Cathedral houses the ‘Golden Bell’ which is the largest in Goa. It is said that in the olden times the ring of this bell reached several kilometers and the villagers were notified of events through this bell. The Cathedral also houses an archaeological museum, where we saw stone scriptures in Marathi, Urdu and Persian excavated in different parts of Goa. It also explained the history of Goa. Outside the museum is a tall standing statue of Afonso de Albuquerque as if to welcome us to the historical times. Thus, we cherished the mesmerizing views of South Goa, learning something about the Portuguese rule and spending time with the beaches, attracting tourists like magnets.

Next day we visited North Goa. We started our day by visiting the Aguada Fort of the Portuguese which was built to guard against the Dutch and the Marathas. This fort provides a spectacular view of the fresh blue Mandovi river below. The word Aguada means ‘water place’ thus explaining its presence around the river. It also has a light house which looks pure white as if it was built yesterday. Not far from Aguada Fort, we visited Sinquerim beach next, which resembled like the one which we would see in Mauritius or other famous beaches in the world. The meeting of soothing blue water with the sand is a beautiful colour combination that one would see. Our next spot, the snow white Saligaon Church was located far away from the hustle and bustle of the city surrounded only and only by tranquility. The beautiful image of Mother Mary holding Jesus in her arms literally seems like God watching over all of us. Goa being a hub of beaches, we visited Baga, Anjuna and Vagator beaches where we saw people enjoying their vacation basking in the company of the sea. We ended our North Goa trip with Chouranginath temple, again an incarnation of Lord Shiva, relaxing ourselves in the composure of the temple.

We felt the Portuguese presence wherever we saw boards in various shops in Portuguese language. It showed that the Portuguese roots are still firm in Goa where people are descendants of Portuguese heritage.  Attracting tourists all over the world, we saw many foreigners exploring Goa on bikes and on foot getting the tan that they needed. On the journey back home, we met a couple from New Zealand, a German woman and a New Zealander man who had come to visit Goa along with their children. It was a pleasure to converse with the woman in German and she had a gleeful look to know that an Indian could speak her language. I feel proud about our nation where tourists come from all corners of the world to explore our rich heritage. The world is wonderfully connected with the mobility options and of course the internet prompts us to visit a different city or country. I wondered about the time when the Portuguese discovered and invaded Goa when none of the modern amenities were present. I think it was only their zeal and curiosity which encouraged them to travel for days and months together to reach a faraway land where everything was new and foreign, be it people or the landscape. They came, they saw and they conquered. It was a challenge that they accepted and made a mark in our history. We bade goodbye to the party capital where beaches, churches and temples provided us respite from monotony and taught us to be susegad in life.

Profanity, I swear!

Headphones have become a must these days. No, not because you can’t hear anything clearly anymore. Nor there is any disturbance in the background. However, the things that you may want to hear can be disturbing. If others listen what you are listening to, eyebrows will be raised and you don’t want to be judged for the content that you are watching. In today’s era of web-series, using cuss words without any censors has given entertainment the raw and realistic representation that it needs. Hence, the need for headphones has risen more than ever.

When entertainment in form of web-series was unknown to me, I remember watching Roadies on MTV or English movies and series on television with frequent beeps at places where it would get uncomfortable to watch with the family around. Any viewer could make out the derogatory or objectionable words from the actors’ lip movements. Maybe a hesitant little step to maintain the originality of the content! If I have to play devil’s advocate, I think that swear words do not always have to sound violent or offensive. They give you fits of laughter and sometimes can be embarrassing as well, if they are articulated in a casual manner. And we Indians feel the sense of familiarity and solidarity with Hindi expletives in particular. As a result, some dialogues and scenes in Sacred Games and Mirzapur gained popularity, apart from the content they showed.  As a Narcos fan, I loved Wagner Moura’s performance as Pablo Escobar. His Spanish expletives and emphasis on each syllable with evident hatred for his enemies made him look like a formidable protagonist-cum-antagonist.

When I was learning German, I took interest in its slang expressions as well, to understand how the language changed its forms as human emotions varied. Gradually the German movies and series acquainted me to some ‘Schimpfwörter’ or swear words commonly used, ‘Scheiße!’ being most common and innocent one. In one of my classes when we were discussing about ‘Schimpfwörter’, we came to know that swear words evolved too, with immigrants entering Germany from various nations. I wondered the number of ways in which we carry our heritage like food, culture and even expletives!

Swear words are not limited to any particular class in a society. They are found in books as well, to convey the situation or environment better. Sometimes the portrayal of a place or the people living there cannot be convincing unless a real picture is shown, albeit with cuss words. And reality, though savage, is something that we long to watch or read because we want to peep into the real world. We swear when we have a reason to be angry with someone or something. But when it comes to music, which is supposed to be soothing and refreshing, cuss words or vulgarity in the songs having no solid context, seem totally unnecessary and look like a means to be a popular hum among listeners. The sentiments associated with expletives are eventually dissolved in the process and soon these words become a part of daily language, though we may not utter them at certain places or in company of some people. Suddenly cuss words and expressions start sounding ‘cool’ to us.

Another amusing thing about expletives is that they are used differently by men and women. Indian men tend to utter Hindi expletives more, in their raw and original form, whether while having casual talks with friends or colleagues or even when there are arguments.  Expletives are very common and come out very smoothly in any normal discussion between some men, especially when drinks act as appendage and sobriety is given a break for some time. When women are around, some men tend to get conscious and avoid saying any beep word, trying to act all suave. I have experienced this in some cases when my male friends or colleagues uttered cuss words in a matter-of-factly way and then immediately realized and apologized for having said them in front of me. I shrugged that off thinking it as a way to express certain emotions. For women, abusing in English makes them sound womanly. Men have a united stand when it comes to hurling abuses- they stick to regional language. But disparity can be seen among women, especially in local trains. Women traveling by first class compartment act sophisticated and hence you may hear English abuses in most cases. On the other hand, women in the second class compartment vent out their anger with a regional touch, sometimes beating out men in the abusing competition. What follows is a melee between several women, almost looking like a riot on the road. In spite of this, some heads turn when they hear a woman using expletives; they think it is very untoward or tomboyish. Wait, aren’t we living in a society where women and men are treated equals? It’s quite ironical that swear words have a restricted use only to men, when in fact some of these words are associated with women. 

Expressing anger or disappointment is a natural human tendency. Some people clear the differences by amicably resolving the disputed matters, while some use these cuss words as weapons to hurt or insult those who have wronged them. It all depends how people tackle anger and disappointment. Also, the usage of atrocities has a lot to do with the environment we grow up in, the people we hang out with or these days, the web content that we watch. In some cases, these very words can get a person in legal trouble. Hence, it is necessary to make careful and prudent use of these words.  Having said that, you cannot label someone as lowly of character just because he or she is foul-mouthed. The real person beyond those words could be warm, kind and affectionate. Coarse language could only be one of the shades making him or her probably a grey personality. Language evolves because of people. Hence, even languages have palette of words, good and bad, like distinct façades of people. It is up to us, which shade we choose from this palette, so that it suits us the best. We play with words every day, even with swear words. So let’s make sure that we do not succumb to the injuries nor injure anyone with these words in a fit of anger or anxiety because extreme emotions are momentary but words remain ingrained in mind for long.

On a Faraway Land

Nowadays we all have become globetrotters, or at least that’s the word we use when we upload umpteen pictures of our trip on social media. Some trip pictures inspire us to go on the same trip ourselves to discover that place and experience the same magic as shown in the pictures. The world has come closer today and a variety of flight options, attractive deals and cashbacks have made travel a cakewalk. Our ideas to visit a particular place is based on our extensive internet research, reviews and pictures. However, Google, the one stop where we find all our answers, may not have answers about the unspoken, undiscovered and unheard part of the world. That brings us to the question whether man has really discovered the entire world. Does the world have more than what catches the eye? What more secrets are yet to be unearthed on this Earth of ours?

It seems I came across one such interesting page of the mysterious world when I read about Sentinelese tribes in Andaman Islands, believed to be one of the world’s last tribes uncontacted by civilization. They came in the news for killing a young American missionary. The article also spoke about other uncontacted and isolated tribes in various parts of the world. Reading about these tribes and what they did for a living, fascinated me. In a world where we strive to make our presence known, here are sets of people who choose to live a life of solitude, away from the modern civilization. I think that they are real guardians of our planet as they protect the natural environment and live a humble life by reaping the gifts of Nature, quite contrary to the ‘civilized’ humans who are wiping the precious elements of Nature off the Earth.

The fact that they are ‘isolated’ and ‘uncontacted’ made me read about them. The internet, in so many forms, connects people from all parts of the world. Yet there exist people like these who are complacent to not be in touch with the modern world. Sometimes I wonder if we can ever live a life like these tribes; isolated and cut off from the world. Is it difficult in today’s world, unless you are nestled in a forest or a mountain with no network in cellphones? In today’s corporate world, it is believed to be rewarding to be always reachable and accessible. There are many people who would still prefer working or checking official mails after going home. There are workaholics who reply to mails even when they are on vacation, making them look like indispensable to the organization. Even mails late at night would mean that you are really dedicated to your work. Such people should learn a thing or two from these uncontacted tribes who do not bother to make their presence known or feel the need to prove anything to people around them.

Man by nature is social and hence we have societies. We have many people around us, but still we may feel lonely, lost and isolated in the crowd that we are in. Therefore, some ‘me-time’ is something that we really need to gift ourselves every day to know ourselves better, to take off the masquerade that we wear and be good listener to our own mind and heart. It should be a break from all the hustle and bustle around us. We go on vacations to get away from all the monotony, to have peaceful time at an exotic place. Yet the mind wanders to the likes and comments on our pictures that we post on social media. Recently I read an article wherein some travelers, in order to get the feel of the place and to truly live the experience, did not carry cameras with them. They just wanted to spend time with that place without letting the world know about their experience. While there are some rational travelers like these, one of my acquaintances had a hard time in a scenic place like Ladakh because he could not find mobile network there to upload live updates and pictures of his trip. With the bustling world of Instagram and Facebook, the world is at our feet and fingertips. Hence it can be challenging to resist the temptation of not being visible on them for a few days. I have seen three categories of people; first, who are totally detached from the nexus of social media, the second who are moderate users of social media and the third, for whom social media is the fourth basic necessity. This last category has regular posts about routine activities of life; be it traffic, crowded railway platforms, weekend plans or something as trivial as posting a ‘Good Night’ selfie. Such people, I feel need a change in the privacy settings of life.

‘Me-time’ for me is spending an hour or two reading, a window which lets me look into the real and fictional world. It is a break from the drama by some real characters around me. We are surrounded by distinct humans who make our lives better or worse; we are surrounded by the modernity which I think could be difficult to part with, though we can certainly modify the way of life. We are part of a civilization which is prospered by the behavior of humans, whether it be in form of committing some deeds or expressions through social media to make their existence known. Sometimes this need for isolation or detachment can have an ugly face as well when we see family members or friends sitting in the same room without interacting with each other, glued to the phone going through the posts of friends with apparently better lives or hypnotically enjoying a gripping show with headphones on, thus literally shutting ears and mind. People are walking and changing with technology and each one of us is just a fine particle in this huge mass of humans, always competing and comparing, without having the need to look for what is best for us. It might not be practically possible to live a nomad life like the tribes or of abstinence from technology, given that it plays a pivotal role nowadays. But surely we can take frequent breaks from this widespread web. Taking a break from modernity or people does not necessarily mean heading out alone somewhere. It could also mean spending time with the people who mean to you, albeit off camera or check-ins. The memories created in that much time could be the best moments of isolation from rest of the world. Meaningful conversations and laughter with someone without having to put a mask on, spending time doing something what you really love, could possibly be the paths to live a life as serene and oblivious like the uncontacted tribes of the world. This ‘me-time’ should be like the space that is only known to you, it should a fictional and ideal land in your mind, where no one is allowed to intrude with vagaries of life. It could be the best gift for you, from you.

The Call of Terra Australis

The globe has been fascinating me since eternity. Different continents, the countries existing within them, the seas and rivers that act as boundaries and beauty of these countries, mountains ranges that spread far and wide, different time zones, everything seems well structured by Nature. If the Earth were a spherical board, then all the countries on it would seem like well-placed tiles with diverse geographies and equally diverse living beings. Each country on the Earth scores very well in its own unique way. As a child, I took great interest in going through the colourful maps in the Atlas. My sister and I often played the game of spotting a city in the world map. A test of eyesight and time, this game used to be my small steps of getting acquainted to the world. The world that was restricted to the pages of my Atlas unearthed soon, thanks to the numerous novels that I read and travel to a few countries.

This year it was time to explore another continent. In fact, I explored a continent cum country. Which continent other than Australia can give you this joy? We visited Sydney, the largest city in Australia. Known as Terra Australis or the Southern Continent, the journey to Australia was indeed a long one. However, all the hours of long journey passed in a jiffy with the excitement surging every hour to discover a new city. Finally, we reached Sydney on a mildly sunny but chilled morning. The onset of fun began from the commute to hotel itself, as I was curiously looking at the sparsely occupied wide roads, the shops, hotels and museums on the way. We reached our humble abode for the next few days and wore off the tiredness of our long journey.

Soon we were charged up to explore the city in the evening. We set off on foot with Google map, the ultimate tour guide throughout our time in Sydney. Our first stop was a vast expanse of greenery in form of Hyde Park. A perfect spot for evening walk in the pleasant weather, Hyde Park is synonymous with tranquility. We walked along the natural green carpets relaxing and rejuvenating ourselves. We saw people lying down comfortably on the grass, having hearty conversations. The park has Anzac Memorial at its centre. It is a symbol of respect to all Australians who served the country during the First World War. I felt that the memorial could not have a more pertinent place than Hyde Park where peace was omnipresent to pay homage to all the brave hearts. Walking further ahead, we saw a tall standing statue of James Cook, a British explorer who achieved the first European contact with Australia during his voyage to the Pacific Ocean. We left from the park, gaining some insight about Australia’s origins and history.

It was getting dark and hence the time came to visit Sydney Tower, the tallest building in the city. When we reached Sydney Tower, I had a sense of déjà vu as it brought back my memories of Kuala Lumpur Tower. We saw the glittering skyscrapers of Sydney from above. The view looked festive with the city decking itself up in colourful lights. We walked around the entire circular area, getting views of churches, gardens and office buildings below from different angles. Sydney Tower is like the tallest student in a class who is visible from every corner. We spotted Sydney Tower wherever we went, amidst other tall buildings, acting like its competitors, but were no match to its height.

Next day we visited one of the darling places in Sydney, the Darling Harbour. This Harbour seemed to have this magnetic pull of attracting a variety of restaurants, commerce and serene waters all at the same place. There was a Ferris wheel as well to add to the entertainment factor. The Ferris wheel again gave us the opportunity to ‘reach heights’ from where we could see the Australian flag at the harbour swaying calmly in the cool breeze. As the evening slowly advanced into darkness, the tall skyscrapers showed their luminous side, casting some of their shimmer on the waters of the harbour. The dazzling waters along with the high-rise buildings presented a collaborative view of natural and man-made wonders.

The next morning we headed out to explore more of Darling Harbour and its beautiful surroundings. Our first stop was Chinese Garden of Friendship. It celebrates Chinese heritage and culture and is filled with bamboo plants, resplendent flowers and waterfalls. The garden signifies the bond between China and Australia. Wandering in the garden gives you the feel of being in China, as you see dragons painted on garden walls and typical structures that you would see only in China. Thus, it was like experiencing another country in a continent cum country!

Darling Harbour also houses an aquarium, Madame Tussauds Wax Statue Museum and Wildlife World. The SEA LIFE Sydney Aquarium contains a variety of Australian aquatic life, the special ones being from the Great Barrier Reef. In the Wildlife World zoo, I was glad to meet Koalas for the first time. Very affable and one of Australia’s unique creatures, we can learn from them to sleep peacefully without having anything to worry about! They were as though physically and emotionally attached to the Eucalyptus trees as they held on to them like a pillow to sleep on. Bidding goodbye to Koalas with the hope of seeing more of these endearing animals, we visited Madame Tussauds next, the hall of famous personalities all over the world. Among the numerous notable personalities that we saw, we were longing to see some of our famous Indian faces. And there they were, the stars of cricket and Bollywood – Sachin Tendulkar and Shah Rukh Khan. Clicking pictures with their wax statues were ultimate fan moments. The lifelike statues of all personalities and the craftsmanship behind them, was another example of unbounded human creativity.

The greenery in Sydney had already captured our hearts. To our delight, Sydney provided us one more opportunity to walk through huge acres of greenery and admire a variety of trees. Choosing an evening again, we went to Royal Botanic Garden, which is stunningly located near Sydney Opera House. You get the opportunity to experience the blue and green colours of nature, with adjacent Opera House providing classic entertainment. Again an example where natural and manmade wonders come together to soothe the human minds!

The next few hours of that evening were my memorable and precious moments in Sydney, none other than at the grand Opera House. Having experienced theatre only with Marathi plays, Opera House was a hub where every form of art was welcomed. To call Opera House a theatre would be like only half describing it. For me, the magnificent Opera House was an experience like never before. This lotus-like structure which is the poster icon of Sydney truly appreciates and encourages theatre in all forms. We attended a captivating Tap Dance show which was worth every single dollar. A guaranteed source of entertainment for two hours, we were awestruck by the performance of these immensely talented Australian tap dancers. It was a never-seen- live-before dance style for me. Everything in the periphery of Opera House exudes grandeur. Like a keen observer, I looked in and around Opera House absorbing its elegance in my eyes and mind as much as possible. Appreciating Opera House’s external beauty and actually experiencing what it has to offer, are two different things. It surely is a man-made wonder, where artists create wonders everyday by stunning the audience with their talent. Adjacent to Opera House is another icon of Sydney- the Sydney Harbour Bridge. Acting like a crown to the Sydney Harbour, the illuminated Harbour Bridge provides a spectacular view. Sydney Harbour Bridge with Opera House at its side celebrates the spirit of Sydney. The entire area encompassing these two magnificent structures with a multitude to restaurants to dine at with the view of Sydney harbour, gives you a feeling larger than life. You cannot simply capture them in the camera and store as pictures; they give you grand memories much more than in pictures to last long.

We headed out next day to capture a shade of blue, in form of Bondi Beach. On the afternoon that we went, the wind and sea were playing some game in which the wind was blowing unstoppably and the sea had waves low and high to display its strength. We walked on the white sand with the cold wind making sure to give us shivers. The waters were calm and angry, changing their mood every now and then. As we drenched our feet in the cold waters of the sea, the waves came gushing at different intensities to welcome us. The beach was spic and span and the water limpid. It was clean and beautiful as Mother Nature had envisioned it. The clear water was encouraging us to clear our minds as well and advising life to go on, like its never-ending waves. Sanity can be learned from every element of nature.

Next day was our last one to explore the beauty of Sydney. We travelled to Blue Mountains where the three mountain sisters were waiting to greet us. On our way to Blue Mountains, we got the opportunity to meet Australian animals for one last time at Featherdale Wildlife Park. We saw Koalas again, shying away from people as usual. Some of them were asleep, clutching to their dear trees, while others looked at the spectators with their sleepy eyes. The kangaroos looked timid and they enjoyed the company of other kangaroos as they ate together and hopped from one place to another joyfully. Having two tiny feet in the front, it’s interesting how they jump like in a sack race. Thanks to their tiny frontal feet their young ones stay safe in their pouches. They were amicable and relished the food fed by humans while getting their backs lovingly stroked. A little away were two dingos, sitting in a photographic pose for the paparazzi around, although one dingo chose not to get into the limelight much. These native, cunning looking dogs of Australia are known for their speed and agility. They look like domestic dogs but their hunting styles very much define them as wild. Moving ahead from this deceptive creature, we lent our ears to the cacophony of various birds of different sizes and distinct colours. Saying goodbye to these Australian natives, we continued our journey to Blue Mountains.

We were fortunate enough to get a taste of Australian countryside as well, as we halted at the village Leura for lunch. A kind of village that you would imagine in books or watch in movies, with houses having gardens in front of them and various shops, restaurants of different cuisines, a post office and fresh air around. It was like being part of one of Nicholas Sparks’ movies where nature looked bountiful. After sometime we finally reached the scenic Blue Mountains. Our first way of exploring it was on a skyway from where we could see the gargantuan mountains, with the Three Sisters nestled in them. We then hopped onto the Scenic Railway, the steepest passenger railway in the world. It was truly an amazing experience with expansive view of the rainforest and Jamison Valley. We then went for Scenic Walkway to discover the tranquility of an ancient rainforest. Along the way we read information about mining history at Jamison Valley. The Scenic Cableway also provides a spectacular view of Jamison Valley and Three Sisters. Next we went to Echo Point, where we could get a closer and breathtaking view of the Three Sisters, the rock formations that are called Meehni, Wimlah and Gunnedoo. Their story is traced back to the Aborigines. The entire area around Blue Mountains exhibited the untouched beauty of nature. The mountains and the sisters would stand strong for centuries to come, for their foundation is formidable. Enchanted by this another wonder of Nature, we headed back to hotel on a cruise till Sydney Harbour. We sailed under the Sydney Harbour Bridge, with tourists clicking as many pictures as possible of it against the setting sun. Finally, we got down near Opera House to say a final goodbye to this enthralling structure. We gazed at the Harbour Bridge and Opera House for a few minutes, mentally clicking pictures to store them in our eternal memories. Thus, they were the last stops of our Australian journey.

Traveling to a developed country teaches you a lot of things. Not only the sightseeing places in Sydney but also the quality of life of the Australians was worth appreciating. I found that the pedestrians walking on the road are given equal consideration as the cars. Permitting to cross a road only when the pedestrian signal opposite showed green, the pedestrians need not look left and right before crossing the road. It also means resisting the temptation of not crossing the empty road if the signal shows red. We traveled by scantily crowded trains without having the need to perform stunts while boarding it. A moderately crowded train at 6:30 or 7.00 in the evening is something unfathomable for a Mumbaikar. Another unfathomable aspect for Mumbaikars would be the fact that Sydney retires early for the night. Roads would be deserted, with only a handful pedestrians around. Australians have indeed taken, “Early to bed, early to rise makes you healthy, wealthy and wise” seriously! The next morning, we headed back home, getting last glimpses of the city as we made our way to the airport. Satisfied that I put a tick on one more country on the world map, the long journey back home was the time to cherish all the fun that we had in Sydney. I looked forward to explore many more countries in future outside the Atlas, for the world is an infinite space waiting for us to have a rendezvous with each of its diverse facets.

Dejected on being Rejected

It is said, “Everything is fair in love and war.” Though love and war are emotions and situations that are two extreme ends of a pole, we still expect them to be fair. Yet most of us overlook this ‘fairness’ part of the proverb. We emphasize more on the ‘anything and everything’ aspect of love and war. I was convinced of this fact when I came across a news of youth stabbing a girl because she did not reciprocate his feelings of love. If love is fair, then why should it have element of violence? It is like love being overshadowed by violence and force. When war (violence) mixes with love, there is no space left for fairness.

When I read and think about such cases, I realize that some human beings are averse to rejection and criticism. We hear some haughty statements like, “I am not used to listening to NO”. This attitude has a lot to do with a person’s upbringing when his or her wishes are somebody else’s commands. Another reason is the machismo or patriarchy existing in a society like ours which turns some men into jilted lovers or perpetrators.

Rejection is capable of bogging us down and sometimes even a reason for falling into depression. But it is also like a bitter medicine which one has to take in order to do better in life. Rejections can teach us a lot. For someone who gets no response from any of the jobs applied, one always has an opportunity to hone his or her skills and be tailor-made for the best job that awaits. Isn’t it why it is said, ‘Failure is the stepping stone to success’? In our country where rat race is ubiquitous in every field, rejections are also inevitable for many who do not get an opportunity to see their dreams taking shape in a desired college or in a dream company, despite hours, days, months and years of hard work. However, patience helps and ultimately rewards the hard-working.

So how can the effect of rejection be diluted? It is good to have one goal in life and strive towards its achievement. Having said that, it is always better to have a plan B as well. There is always a possibility that we may necessarily not get what we want. In such a scenario, it is better to go with an alternate plan than cursing the fate for not granting your wish. Because time sprints and waits for none, the disappointments can look uglier if there are no efforts to drive the car of Life on some other, albeit bumpy road. We wish to lead our life on a smooth road, but the road is not always smooth. There have to be speed-breakers in form of rejections and failures. They are the toll that we pay to value what we already have in life and constantly persevere to improve.

In cases where love for someone does not get reciprocated, I think that life still should not stop for one person in particular. Resorting to extreme steps or going binge drinking in memory of that person may seem entertaining in movies or novels, but in reality it is an irrational step.  Life can be better without that ‘one special person’ and you alone have to be a catalyst for that betterment. It starts by keeping least expectations from people around you. That one step helps to ease the pain of disappointment that could arise in future.

Though rejection, failure, disappointment make us gloomy, but to fear them and not give something a try is again a sign of having low faith in yourself. Fear of rejection will never pull us out of our comfort zones and forever keep us complacent. If you have a lot of potential, but still refrain from doing better for yourself with the fear of being rejected, it is like being unfair to yourself and killing the strengths that you may possess. A person can still achieve what he wants by overcoming all the demons in his life, maybe not in the prime of his young age but at later point of time in life. The sense of satisfaction on fulfillment of a dream by defeating the hurdles in form of rejections and failures is the greatest feeling in the world. It is a test of a person’s perseverance and endurance to go for something that he likes, fighting all the odds. Rejections or failures can be shattering at first, but when taken in a positive way, it is possible to rise like a Phoenix and still win the world.

City of Nizams and Pearls: A Sojourn in Heritage and Creativity

India is a land of myriad geographies, diverse history, resplendent cultures and unique people. To explore India is like listening to distinct stories which the cities narrate. Tourism flourishes thanks to the heritage every city has to boast about. This year we decided to visit Hyderabad where history, nature and corporates exist together to make it a city of opportunities and a place where the depths of rich history can be explored and adored. Mumbai being the financial capital has this unique blend of history, festivities and commercialization too. We decided to unfold another chapter of Indian history by visiting Hyderabad.

We checked into a hotel in Ramoji Film City, a grand city in Hyderabad. Though this was my second visit to Ramoji, I still enjoyed the time spent there afresh. Ramoji is an experience to cherish the remarkable man-made wonder. Film-making is a challenging art. What we watch on screens has lot of things going on in the background. While we appreciate the actors in the film, it is the people working behind the screens who take efforts to make a film best that it is. We saw various sets, astonishingly made of cardboard, yet had the appeal of bricks and mortar. The major attraction among the sets was that of Baahubali. The magnificent Mahishmati Kingdom shown in the movie had its roots in the vast area of Ramoji Film City. Though in partially dismantled state, the sets could still give the grand feeling of the movie. The songs and dialogues played in the background, adding touch to this amazing experience. It was yet another beautiful glimpse of immense efforts put in by the team behind the curtains. The tricks which the directors use in the film and the way they are presented to the viewers in a promising way, was a fascinating thing to learn about film-making. Talent lies even in the tricks! Ramoji has struck a perfect equilibrium between nature and creativity: on one hand there were life-like sets, emanating talent from shows, amusement rides and on the other hand there were various parks dedicated to a variety of flora and fauna as a step towards environmental awareness, apart from attracting numerous tourists. It is an impeccably planned architectural wonder, making sure that there is enough greenery around to offer tranquility. I was marveled at the number of jobs this one wonder had created, providing a decent livelihood to many. I also experienced how the hospitality industry works, whose ultimate aim is to satisfy its customers. Ramoji Film City was a complete package of entertainment, well-maintained environment and peace of mind.

After spending a day in this epitome of creativity, we headed the next day to explore the city. Our first destination for the day was Nehru Zoological Park. Being an ardent lover of animals, I looked forward watching some of my favourite animals. We were greeted first by an intrepid jaguar, wearing a coat of his God-gifted impressive spotted skin. A little ahead we saw my most favourite animal: the majestic tiger. While the jaguar flaunted his spotted coat, the tiger with his perfectly brushed stripes exhibited his elegance. Big Cats are known for their stealth and hence one could not guess what was going on in the tiger’s mind as he walked from one place to another as though deep in thought. We stood there for a long time looking at this ferocious national animal of ours. We saw elephants who were leisurely grazing in the vegetation with nothing to care about in the world. These intelligent animals have always amazed me. We saw deer and emus living together in harmony. Who said that you always need like-minded beings to live with? Giraffes, bears and jackals showed their respective traits as well. We entered the world of birds who were decked up in variety of colours. Nature’s palette of colours must be having endless shades to add to the beauty of these birds! The showstopper of the zoo was the colourfully adorned peacock who opened his feathers as if to pose in front of the many shutterbugs. It was a pleasant treat to the eyes. When the peacock realized that his fans are done capturing his beauty on their cameras, he diligently closed his feathers. The zoological park had lot of greenery to make it conducive for our animal friends. Bidding goodbye to these cheerful animals and birds, we went ahead to see more of the city prospered by humans.

Our next destinations were Charminar and Chowmahalla Palace. Charminar, the jewel of the city, stands strong amidst the hustle and bustle of the city. There were many people posing for pictures in front of this gigantic structure. The surrounding markets offering a plethora of products and hordes of people give hardly any time to stand and appreciate the structure. Yet the beauty of Charminar does not go unnoticed. It makes you look high at its tall minarets to appreciate the intricate designs that they flaunt. Chowmahalla Palace, not very far from Charminar, had four grand palaces next to each other- Aftab, Mehtab, Tehniyat and Afzal. They narrated the history of lineage of Nizams. In the area outside the palaces, there were vintage cars and trams of the Nizams which took us back to the olden times. The eye pleasing chandeliers in the palaces, the attires of the Nizams and the still fresh colours of Khilwat Mubarak i.e. the seat of the Asaf Jahi dynasty exhibited the royal lifestyle of the Nizams. Another awe-inspiring structure within Chowmahalla Palace is the Clock Tower in which the clock has been ticking for around 250 years.  What richness truly meant, we understood after visiting this impregnable structure. Our next stop was Salarjung Museum where one could see glimpses of art from all around the world. Nawab Mir Yusuf Ali Khan, then Prime Minister of Hyderabad, had collected these unique artifacts from different parts of the world and made it possible for us to understand what meaning and style art has in various parts of the world. These ancient and medieval paintings, sculptures and artifacts would give a tough competition to the modern art with their fresh colours and out-of-the-box creativity. I realized that human brain is like an ocean of multitudes of ideas which are beautifully depicted when presented on canvas or in sculptures or artifacts. Having a creative mindset is therefore of utmost importance to display the strides in human capabilities.

India is a country where every God of every religion is considered sacrosanct. We visited the milky white Birla Mandir to pay our respects to the highly revered deities. The temple is clad in pure white marble as though encouraging to have purity in our thoughts as well. We spent some peaceful time in vicinity of the Almighty, simultaneously getting rejuvenated in the composure around. After relaxing ourselves in the gentle breeze of the temple, we headed towards the last destinations of our city tour- Hussain Sagar Lake and Lumbini Park. Hussain Sagar Lake seems to expand beyond the eyesight with the statue of Buddha standing proudly in the middle, showering his blessings on people. This vast body of water is a solace around the busy roads of Hyderabad. The sun was setting to soon give way to the Light and Laser show at Lumbini Park. Eager to watch yet another spectacle of creativity, I sensed a feeling of déjà vu when I had visited a similar laser show in Sentosa Island, Singapore last year. The laser show at Lumbini Park left us awestruck with the mind-blowing combination of music and dancing lights.  The thirty-minute show illuminated us with memories of a lifetime.

We reached the end of the day, enervated. Yet the glimpses of the entire day spent in Hyderabad city were captured in our minds and eyes forever. As I had rightly said, every city has a story to tell and Hyderabad was a perfect raconteur who narrated its stories through its grandeur. It was soon time to take leave from the rich city of Nizams to come back to modern-day rich Mumbai and embrace the daily struggles. Despite the struggles, I have learned from Nizams to live life, king-size!

Hear me out!

Since childhood we know this proverb, “Speech is silver but silence is golden.” We all love to speak and want to have audience to respond to something that we speak. When I remember this proverb taught in school, I believe that nowadays we are rushing more for silver than gold. We are simply ignoring the gold in our lives i.e. to sit silently and listen, because we are busy expressing ourselves in various forms. The urge to pour the heart out is so intense that it surpasses the need to listen. Even the English language has provided two different words for the similar function that is carried out by our ears: ‘to hear’ and ‘to listen’. In today’s world, where we admire good speakers, we are slowly losing the ability, or rather the interest to listen. We hear a lot of things, but surely most of it falls on our deaf ears. Probably, soon the job of listening will be restricted only to counsellors and psychiatrists.

I am a part of many group conversations, either online or face-to-face. I particularly remember being part of one of the conversations where we sat as one group. However, in my mind there were two groups in this one group: The Eager Speakers and The (Compelled) Audience. In this case I belonged to the latter category. The Eager Speakers continuously went on speaking as if our conversation was all the platform that they had. But here there was a tinge of tussle. It is said that likes repel. In this conversation, the Eager Speakers were cut short or interrupted by their like-minded friends. Therefore, it seemed that I was witnessing two parallel conversations. In this process, I discovered a third category in this conversation. I call that person ‘Master Eager Speaker’. Such Masters dive into the conversation by making their point in a loud voice. The other eager souls were left agape when their master forcefully broke in out of nowhere. By now, the (compelled) audience finds it hard to remember what was the original topic that led to this cacophony. Finally, when the Eager Speakers and Masters were finished unloading everything that they had in mind, they ask the exhausted audience, “Oh why are you so silent today? Is anything wrong?” When the already distressed listener heaves a sigh of relief that the speakers are not inconsiderate after all and rejoices at the opportunity to speak, he is again attacked by incessant blabber of Eager Speakers. The attention of the Eager Speakers could be held only if you have any fresh piece of interesting information.

Some people listen only to react. They shut their ears and mind to everything what the person opposite has to say. No matter how much good sense your words make, the adamant listener still says, “I don’t buy what you say.” In this case, we cannot call that person ‘listener’ if he or she is merely hearing you without giving any thought. Most of the times the preference to listen to someone greatly depends on our perception of the speakers. Thus, Horn or Halo attitude come into picture. Then there is another category of listeners whom I call ‘The Analysts’. These Analysts have anecdotes and comparisons for every point that you make. No matter which incident you narrate, it has already happened with them and a detailed report of comparative analysis is ready with them. Soon, the anecdotes of the analysts become the epicenter of discussion. The person who wanted to be heard is soon lost in the crowd of discussions, because every general topic soon becomes a personal topic for the Analysts.

Therefore, I find that selective listening is the best alternative to avoid falling prey to unnecessary chatter. We are ardent listeners of the people we find respectable. But what are the consequences of being listeners to bad influencers? In Mythology, we have examples of Kaikeyi and Kauravas who became grey personalities as result of unwanted listening. Even today, we have many Mantharas and Shakunis in personal and professional world who are set to disturb the peace around. It is the brainwashing that such people are good at. With such devious people, it is necessary to make good use of the two ears that we are blessed with: one to listen with and the other one to immediately eliminate something that sounds destructive. In order to distinguish between the good and the bad, it is important to have your own set of principles and opinions, so that the filtering out of information becomes easier. When the misleading speaker is aware of the fact that the listener has a feeble and indecisive personality, the speaker soon becomes dominant and the listener submissive. Eventually the influencer takes charge of the listener’s brain too. In some situations, the speaker is not an evil soul, but in fact a distressed one. Such distressed speakers are constantly finding reservoirs to let go off their burden. A conversation with such people is equally mind-crippling as their litany of worries and problems never seem to end. The distressed souls do not necessarily need a correct audience to listen to their worries. Any stranger could also be their reservoir.

A dialogue and therefore communication is successful only when there is an equilibrium between speaking and listening. Listening is also an art that has to be mastered. In our Listening Comprehension module in German, we pay detailed attention to what the speakers say. Any miscomprehension and we lose marks in the exam. Similarly, in our lives we must be good listeners so that there is no misunderstanding and the bond remains unbroken. Of course, the words can be twisted and statements like “You must have heard me wrong” are common. Still, listening is something that we need to pay more attention to. The formula for successful relationships is the give and take of encouraging words, a perfect blend of expression and listening. The day you master the art of listening with an ability to distinguish between productive and unnecessary, no matter how much pessimism surrounds you, it still does not reach the heart. After all, the ears are the gateway that transport words to your heart. It is up to you whether you want to burden your mind by listening to something that can take away that wonderful smile of yours. Rather than being eavesdroppers it is always best to be rational listeners, so that whatever you listen, is always music to your ears!